Dennis and Sandra Foote will be celebrating their 48th anniversary in March. They met each other in the small grocery store where Sandra worked for six weeks before they were married in 1975.
As many readers of this newspaper know, I like writing feature stories, especially feel good stories. I really like to write about couples and share their beautiful stories. For the past couple years, I've asked several couples if they would be interested in sharing their story with readers of The Superior Express. The answers have been "no" for various reasons. Good reasons, but that doesn't help me share a good story. I've frequently been told I should tell my story. With some hesitation, I've decided to share what I consider to be the really cool portions of my story.
Many years ago, I was married to a person who was (as I found out later) not going to stay for a lifetime as I expected. This has happened to many people and now seems to be the norm rather than the exception. This is sad but true.
On Dec. 24, 1974, my husband said he didn't want to be married anymore. He left me with a son to raise. I found a job at a grocery store in Thermopolis, Wyoming, in January of 1975. It was a cute little grocery store and the family that ran it was good to me. I wasn't used to seeing repeat customers because we had just moved to Thermopolis from Glendale, Arizona, which is a suburb of Phoenix. Everyone who came into the store was a new face to me.
One older woman was coming in regularly. One day in late January her son took her on a shopping trip. I talked to him a bit while his mother shopped. It was just small talk. He had what I called a "regulation" haircut. I asked if he was military and he said "no."
It wasn't a huge conversation. On Feb. 1, he returned to the store with his mom and this time he brought a cute little girl with him. His mom and I had visited a bit off and on during her short shopping trips and she saw parallels in her son's life and mine. This day she began to tell me all sorts of things about her son and granddaughter. I listened intently and also shared about me and my son.
What are the chances that there would be so many similarities?
In Wyoming it only takes 30 days for a divorce to become final if there is no contest. My divorce was not final until Feb. 5.
The customer and her son left the store. A half hour later the store got a call from the son. He asked to talk to Kathy. He didn't remember my name but he knew he wanted to talk to me.
I answered the phone and he said, "Hi, I'm the guy that was in the store with his mom."
I acknowledged recalling who he was. He then went on to say, "I would like to take you out sometime."
During the month following Christmas Eve, I had learned to judge kind and loyal people. (While I was a child, no one taught me how to judge the attitudes of people.) I determined this guy was kind, gentle and had the qualities I was looking for, even though I was done with men.
During the phone call I agreed to go out with him.
Dennis, his mother, Eva, and his daughter, Denise, came over to my house. Eva offered to babysit my son, Tyree, along with Denise while we went out on our date.
I asked Eva if Tyree could call her Grandma because I didn't want him to get confused when Denise would be calling her Grandma and he would probably call her Eva. She agreed to him calling her Grandma.
In reality, I knew right then I was going to marry Dennis so to start Tyree calling her Grandma from the beginning seemed logical to me. Besides, my son was quite intelligent for his age, (3-1/2 years old) and I knew there would be no confusion for him.
Our first date was Feb. 1. We were married March 21, 1975. I do not recommend this for anyone! It worked for us, but it has not been easy. I genuinely believe Dennis was a gift from God.
It's been 48 years since those days and we've both had second thoughts at times. I think marriages are supposed to be perfect. Most marriages have been seemingly perfect from the outside. Then all of a sudden you see couples split up a seemingly perfect marriage.
Dennis and I both had challenging childhoods. Our role models were non-existent.
We learn from trial and error. We have a quirky sense of humor that would ruin most relationships. But it works for us.... most of the time. We were married before a justice of the peace, nervous as can be because we knew what we were doing and it was a serious decision to commit to. There was no fancy wedding. Nor huge reception. There was no real family support for us except for his mom and brother. We lived life simply and worked hard to raise our children, Tyree and Shayna, to be productive citizens. (Denise lived with her mom and her step-dad.)
Now we are in our senior years and still together. I still think he is a gift from God, most of the time! I have told Dennis "I don't want our lives to change at all!"
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